I Have Zlata Thoughts

Share this post

New: The Pitch Bitch

zlatathoughts.substack.com

New: The Pitch Bitch

Plus: My BFCM sale, NewZ, & FunnieZ

Zlata Faerman
Nov 21, 2022
3
2
Share this post

New: The Pitch Bitch

zlatathoughts.substack.com

HelloZ

It’s Thanksgiving (already! how? why!?), so I imagine everyone’s mentally preparing. Surely there will be lots to discuss with the family, including politics, all the ways they think we’re fucking up our kids, and how the turkey is too dry. ✨All the things to be grateful for. ✨ I’m hosting this year, and still trying to figure out what’s on the menu and how far in advance I’m able to make everything, so it’s not a scramble on Thursday. I have yet to master the art of timing when it comes to cooking. I’ll be sharing my cooking (per usual), so feel free to follow along on my Insta.

Thanksgiving Flash Sale

In honor of gratitude, Black Friday and the holiday spirit, I am having a sale! Now through Cyber Monday, get 30% off any annual subscription — that brings the subscription cost down to $56 for the year, which is less than $5/month!

I Have Zlata Thoughts is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

As a reminder, a paid subscription gets you access to everything (!), including:

  • All the Tips and Tricks for Holiday Gift Guides

  • Affiliate Marketing 101

  • Taking Your Affiliate Marketing Program Next Level

Plus the rest of The Archives!

Upgrade now to access everything….including the BELOW NEW SERIES! Keep reading!

Get 30% off for 1 year

Honestly though, I’m grateful AF for YOU!

LFG!


New SerieZ: The Pitch Bitch

I’ve had a bevy of pitches coming my way, thanks to a ton of new assignments. And it’s inspired me to create a new segment within my Substack for paid subscribers! It’s something I really have always wanted to do because I think there’s so much TO SAY AND TO LEARN, but I never really had an outlet for it, until now! I shared my idea with the brilliant and ever-insightful

Aly Walansky
and came up with the following: I will share some of the pitches I receive — redacted/anonymized, of course! — along with some critiques and pointers.

Because here’s the deal: If a pitch can’t give me what I need in 1 scan or less, I’m skipping it. And that sucks! Because there are plenty of products out there that deserve the coverage and fit my assignments to a T. But I get hundreds of pitches, and I am BUSY AF. So to get my (and other editors’) attention, you need to refine your messages. And I want to help! I’ve always been so tempted to respond to certain pitches I receive with a note that says, “Hey, can I just provide some quick feedback for you?”

My focus with the Pitch Bitch is to educate publicists who are out here fighting the good fight with their pitching. I know the fight well! I write for media pubs, I am actively engaged in PR, and I run affiliate marketing programs. I really see pitches from every angle there is, and this vantage point has given me a unique perspective on what works (and what doesn’t!). **All this is to say that this new segment is about driving community conversation and not at all about roasting anyone.**

First segment is up already! Check it here. This page is also on the menu of my main profile, so you can always access it with ease.

So if there was ever the perfect time to take advantage of my BFCM deal of 30% off, it’s now!

Get 30% off for 1 year

But wait…there’s more! Separately, I’m also offering this as a custom service through ZlataPR. Get a personalized critique of your pitch from me. (It will not be published unless you want it to be.) This is not a full edit, but rather a critique. Happy to discuss editing needs as well, of course! If you have a new client or product, I can help you polish up your pitches before you start media outreach! It’s a fast and affordable way to put your best work forward. The below link is also a shortcut on my Substack’s menu for easy access!

Submit your pitch for Z's critique


TV TimeZ

  • Have you seen the season 2 premiere of The Sex Lives of College Girls on HBOMAX? If you haven’t seen this show yet, get on it! Two new episodes are waiting for ya!

  • In newZ worth celebrating, HBO has renewed The White Lotus for season three. The social satire is currently (and deservedly!) the top-ranked program on HBO Max.

  • Meanwhile, over on Peacock, the Season 5 premiere of Yellowstone pulled 15.7 million viewers, the most of any show in all of 2022. Giddyup. I tried three times (!!) to get through the first episode and could not. #facts

  • Mariah Carey graces us with her glitz and glamour later this week at Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. She might be known for her five-octave range now, but let’s not forget she also kicked off Nick Cannon’s quest for populating the globe back in 2011. OG. 


NewZ

  • Plot Twist: A Changing of the Bobs. Disney has asked Bob Iger to replace Bob Chapek as CEO effective immediately, following a tumultuous year that saw poor earnings, political spats and a company reorganization. Bob Iger was CEO prior to Chapek, making him Chapek’s predecessor and successor. 

  • CBS left Twitter (only to return a few hours later!), and Donald Trump is back. Chaos is definitely on the horizon, and I’m screenshotting jokes like a woman scorned. Do you follow me on Instagram yet?

  • There is now a 90-day waiting period to get verified on Twitter. They’ve also announced they can impose waiting periods for new accounts at their discretion without notice. How’s all that free speech going, Elon?

  • Sex sells, but what about stickers? OnlyFans is rolling out a new e-commerce feature for creators. The new feature enables content creators to sell personalized merchandise including stickers, apparel and more.


FunnieZ

Twitter avatar for @kanyewest
ye @kanyewest
Shalom : )
11:17 PM ∙ Nov 20, 2022
508,357Likes57,702Retweets

This motherFCKer thinks he’s hilarious.

Twitter avatar for @IntrovertProbss
Introvert Problems @IntrovertProbss
Nice try unknown number, I don’t even answer calls from people I know.
6:04 PM ∙ Nov 20, 2022
54,590Likes8,631Retweets
Twitter avatar for @ih8rts
IG: closedapp @ih8rts
so what do you like to do for fun? me:
Image
8:47 PM ∙ Nov 20, 2022
203,232Likes50,800Retweets
Twitter avatar for @Y2SHAF
Shafeeq @Y2SHAF
the most random people show up in my dreams 😭 like what the hell you doing here
1:27 PM ∙ Nov 20, 2022
13,705Likes3,166Retweets
Twitter avatar for @f8the
miss martian @f8the
i get mad for 3 mins or 8 yrs there’s literally no in between
10:43 PM ∙ Nov 20, 2022
5,459Likes1,591Retweets
Twitter avatar for @lowkeyalbert
⋆ @lowkeyalbert
"are u ok?" of course not next question
11:45 AM ∙ Nov 21, 2022
4,851Likes1,732Retweets
Twitter avatar for @slvppy
$𝔩𝔞𝔭☃️ @slvppy
mfs delete they social media and start acting like they got a master degree in maturity
11:03 PM ∙ Nov 19, 2022
112,570Likes11,060Retweets

PHEW. THAT WAS A LOT.

That’s all for today, guys! Like what you see? Share with a friend!

Share I Have Zlata Thoughts

I Have Zlata Thoughts is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

2
Share this post

New: The Pitch Bitch

zlatathoughts.substack.com
Previous
Next
2 Comments
Kate @ Yield PR
Nov 22, 2022Liked by Zlata Faerman

Just came here to say today's funniez 👍 😂 also, the new pitch review and feedback space is great!

Expand full comment
Reply
1 reply by Zlata Faerman
1 more comment…
TopNewCommunity

No posts

Ready for more?

© 2023 Zlata Faerman
Privacy ∙ Terms ∙ Collection notice
Start WritingGet the app
Substack is the home for great writing